• So what if I'm the kind of girl that doesn't give a ********,
    So what if I'm the kind of girl, who would rather just give up..?
    I'm the sorry girl.
    The one you broke again and again.
    I'm the one trying to fix herself just to be shot down again.
    So what if I'm the quiet one who wants to turn and run.
    So sick of all the things that this life has to give.
    Too eager to forgive.
    Broken in the end.
    Always broken.
    At the begining of every end.
    Why won't this go away?
    The emptiness is seeping through.
    Straight to my very core.
    There's nothing I can do.
    My heart; it feels so sore.
    I want it all to be better.
    But you don't care.
    You want you to be better.
    Screw the girl who loves you with all of her being.
    The girl that would die for you.
    And screw these so called "friends".
    After being stepped on and stabbed one too many times.
    What's the point in living, 'cause we're living just to die.
    Take my breath away, and maybe then can I survive.
    Stab me in the heart.
    You never cared from the start.
    You twist and lie,
    'Cause all you want is some stupid guy.
    'Cause all you NEED is some stupid guy.
    Well ******** you too.
    'Cause he's my life.
    And you did it just to hurt me.
    My heart is a black hole.
    I'm so broken...
    I want to be me.
    Happy and free.
    I want to be me.
    Not afraid to speak.
    The thoughts on my mind, they're driving me crazy.
    So much going on.
    So much hurt, pain, betrayal.
    So much grief, blood, anger.
    So much. So much. So very much.
    Is it time?
    Is it my time so stop living this horribly complex lie?
    Finally sit and cry...
    After all this time trying so hard to deny.
    I love you. I need you. I want you.
    You're gone.
    It's all my fault.
    I messed it up, and I sware it'll be the death of me.
    All of these haters. These backstabbers.
    They want me to back them up, and beat your a** for messin'.
    But ********. I'm ready to jump in and help you.
    I can't take this.
    I'm so ready to break.
    So close to suicide.
    I just want it all back.
    'Cause without it I am nothing.
    When you left, you forgot to give me my heart back.
    When they stabbed the knife, they missed the spot, and here I lie dying on the inside.
    Finish your ******** job.
    'Cause you're so unfamous for that.
    Is it your fun to watch me like this?
    I'm a wreck.
    I'm the one that's there for everyone else, but as soon as I need them, there's not one around.
    I'm sick of being strong, 'cause I just wanna break and cry.
    For nothing. For everything.
    Cry for everything good and bad.
    And know that someone cares.
    Cry for all the violence and the drama, 'cause I'm caught up in your crossfire.
    'Cause the results could be my demise.


    ______________________________________________________________



    (Explain a bit?)

    Ugh.
    I'm not good at explaining my feelings, but I needed to write something.
    Preferably a poem to help. That wasn't much of a poem. Just...poetic-ish...feelings.

    Everything is wrong, and not a single thing is right. But I have no one to turn to, and I just want one person to be there for me to help me. Someone I trust and love, and they love and trust me back.

    That's not likely lately, because of all the stuff going on.

    I fell for him so hard, and now he's gone.
    I can't get past that.
    ******** cutting again. And I can't stop.

    The stupid numb, empty feeling is coming again.
    It's like a cold winter, coming in for the freeze.

    But I hate it, 'cause I can still cry, and care about all the things I'm losing.

    I'm just ready to die.
    I think I want to.

    I just want to be with my friends.
    I want them to know I care.
    And that I would never hurt them or stab them in the back.

    And that's ******** bad, 'cause they all do it to me with the exception of like two.
    But they are my life. They're the ones that pull me through, but no one cares anymore. No...they never really did. But now they don't even pretend.


    I'm so ********.