• Jealousy:
    a feeling that is the most common;
    the most unpleasant.
    I feel it when I look at him:
    He talks, he laughs,
    Carefree.
    He is what I strive to be.
    But for him, it is effortless,
    natural.
    It just. . .
    is.

    My eyes glaze over with longing,
    longing to be part of something,
    something I will never know.
    I wish,
    Sometimes,
    That I could trade places:
    That I could be someone else,
    Anyone else.

    He's my love,
    The reason I wake up.
    Every day
    I am willing to have my heart rebroken,
    Until I feel like a rock on the shore,
    With the tide beating against me.
    Soon I'm worn away:
    All that remains is my spirit.
    It is not enough.

    He doesn't even know the pain he causes me,
    Nor the joy that seeing him brings me.
    But I know he will never be mine.
    He is above-and-beyond,
    A mere shadow of a thought:
    A mere flicker of a wish.
    He may share my feelings,
    Even my thoughts,
    Alas,
    We are apart.
    Forever.
    Separated by the generations.

    I won’t despair
    And I will attempt not to hold grudges.
    ‘Tis no one’s fault,
    Soon it shall fade,
    Soon it won’t matter,
    For he will be gone.

    He will leave this Godforsaken place
    In order to reach his potential.
    And soon,
    I shall be only a memory,
    The smirk on his face his wife won’t understand,
    The glaze over his eyes his children will try to obliterate,
    The reason he tosses and turns at night, but can’t tell a soul.
    For I know he will remember,
    How could he forget?
    I will remain in his memory for eternity.

    I won’t have a guilty conscience,
    and neither will he.
    For we have committed no crime,
    no sin.
    Unless it is a sin to,
    Every day,
    Have your heart broken:
    Then rebroken.