-
I just sit.
Watching all the popular girls.
With there poofy hair.
Like there the school's mayor.
Looking down.
Not making myself proud.
Nobody willing to talk.
There just going places to block.
Try to talk.
But i get ignored.
Pushing me around.
In every little town.
Try to be brave.
But people will always call me naive.
Need help.
Just stabbing myself thats what i felt.
Just need a friend.
But just sit.
Watching everyone else.
Looking down upon the sorrow princess.
- by Vivid luna |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 08/18/2010 |
- Skip
- Title: Alone
- Artist: Vivid luna
- Description: I just try to make friends like everywhere. In school , the mall , etc. :< but everyone ignores me. Im not desprate :D but yea just a little lonely. I have only one friend cuz all my friends r like fk off :D haha so yea. My friend is in vacation FARR away .
- Date: 08/18/2010
- Tags: alone
- Report Post
Comments (4 Comments)
- Vivid luna - 08/23/2010
- ty for the advice ^_^ ill work on that
- Report As Spam
- Eidolon Style - 08/23/2010
-
The idea is powerful. Perhaps you should execute the poem in a better way. Be more specific and really feel your emotion! I think I got too much of the outside world in this poem, and not enough of the inside of you as a person suffering from this loneliness. Adding that visible emotion will really make this a powerful piece; it may even inspire some people to help those kids who are being neglected.
I love the idea. I really love the honesty in this poem. 3/5! Good luck, I wish you the best. - Report As Spam
- Vivid luna - 08/18/2010
- thank you ^_^
- Report As Spam
- MyKitKat18 - 08/18/2010
- Aww yeah i know how you feel. I didn't have a true friend till 5th grade. The others just used me. Hope you make more friends smile
- Report As Spam