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My hand misses your fingerprints
left along my hand from the grip
that you will always hold me
tight like you don't want me to fall
off the cliff into despressions
that will bring me to despair
left alone in the dark
knowing you're not there..
Written by: Paige heart
[KoolBeansBabee]
- by KoolBeansBabee |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 09/22/2008 |
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- Title: Fingerprints
- Artist: KoolBeansBabee
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Description:
Please read, && comment please. (i like opinions so feel free 2 give them 2 me)
&& will return the favor :] - Date: 09/22/2008
- Tags: fingerprints
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Flint Jakobs - 09/22/2008
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My hand misses your fingerprints
left along my hand (you've used "my hand" in both lines, it's rather repetitive because of it)
off the cliff into despressions (depression)
that will bring me to despair
left alone in the dark
knowing your (you're) not there..
It's a sweet sentiment, but the writing itself isn't all that great... - Report As Spam
- Azaveil - 09/22/2008
- I like the rhythm of this. It reminds me of some of my older poetry. Lots of cliffs, depression and loneliness. Lately I've been writing more lyrics than poetry, maybe I'll give it a shot again. Good job.
- Report As Spam